


Hips Don't Lie

by shiftingweather



Series: Destiel crack [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack Fic, can be read as pre destiel, there is no reason for it to even exist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-04
Updated: 2013-07-04
Packaged: 2017-12-17 16:05:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/869382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shiftingweather/pseuds/shiftingweather
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel comes home late to what he thinks is any empty hotel room but actually contains a singing, dancing Dean Winchester.</p>
<p>Crack fic</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hips Don't Lie

Castiel arrives back at the motel room between 9:30 and 10 pm. The car park is empty; the Impala isn’t in the bay. Castiel has just returned from smiting demons. Oh, and doing the grocery shopping. He runs a hand along the railing separating the carport from the patio. The yellow, stained curtains in the windows are drawn and the lights are off. Cas figures the Winchesters have gone out for research, although it was more likely he’d find them drunk in the bar down the road. 

Unlocking the door, Castiel crosses the threshold and enters the front room. The layout is a bit different than what his is used too; a main room with a dining table and small kitchenette containing two doors to the individual rooms on the sides. The front room is a mess. Dean’s guns are lying on the table with Sam’s laptop balancing hazardously on a pile of books. Newspaper articles were strung up on the wall, their grotesque pictures on display. Dean had put the ‘do not disturb’ sign on the door when they had arrived. After an unfortunate experience involving a maid walking in on them and calling the police, Dean made sure to hang the sign out as soon as they opened the door. 

Castiel clears a path through the rubbish to the kitchenette. Picking up old burger packets and beer bottles was a habit. He was constantly reminding the boys to clean up after themselves but they never listened. He walks into the kitchenette and places the bag of groceries down on the counter. He had gone shopping to pick up a few snacks. They are now in possession of a box of chocolates, a pie, and some fruit for Sam and himself. He begins to pull the groceries from the bag stopping when he hears music start playing in his room.

Obviously, his earlier assessment was incorrect; there was another presence in the motel room. Manifesting his angel blade, Castiel crept to the door listening to the music. His expression turns to confusion as he observed a few of the lyrics were being sung in Spanish. Rasing the hand with the blade in to a defensive position, Castiel slowly nudges open the door to his room. The lights are dim, music playing from a MP3 player on the bed. Narrowing his eyes, Castiel shuffles further into the room wary of any sudden attacks. 

Light filters out from under the bathroom door, steam changing the humidity of the room. Somebody had just finished showering if the steam was anything to go by. There is no sound from the other side of the door.

Castiel was preparing to kick the door down when the MP3 player changed tracks. The song changes to a similar sounding tune. The sound of trumpets met Cas’s ears. He picks up the player to investigate the music.

The door to the bathroom flies open and is almost ripped from its hinges. Through the fog Castiel makes out the shape of a man. They emerge from the mist nodding their head in time with the music. Dean’s facial features soon become noticeable as he struts in time to the trumpets. Concerned, Castiel drops his blade.  
Dean’s wet hair flicking water onto Castiel as he shakes his head. Castiel flushed when he notices Dean is only wearing a towel around his waist. They share rooms often but he has never seen Dean not fully clothed.

"Dean," Castiel inquired, his gravelly voice more hoarse than usual, “What is happening?"

Ignoring Cas’ question, Dean takes the MP3 player from his hand and turns the volume up to 100%. The song reaches the first verse and Dean starts to mouth the words. The movement of his mouth becoming more and more dramatic with each passing second, he dances swaying his hips in time. 

The song reaches the chorus and Dean starts to sing along. "OH BABY WHEN YOU TALK LIKE THAT, YOU MAKE A WOMAN GO MAD." 

The singing was worse than Castiel had expected. He would have found it more soothing to listen to a cat give birth.

"Dean, please stop." Castiel urged holding his hands up as a barrier between him and the awful singing.

"BE WISE." Dean’s singing was relentless.

"No!" Castiel cradled his ears. They didn’t deserve this torture. 

"AND KEEP ON."

Cas is on the floor in a ball. He is a ball of pain. “STOP!"

"READING THE SIGNS OF MY BODY!"

Dean turns off the player and winks at Castiel’s crumpled form. He retreats back into the bathroom leaving Castiel a sobbing mess on the floor.

**Author's Note:**

> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWErisOfeyE  
> Link for the song if by chance you don't know it.


End file.
